It has been way too long, friends! I apologize I did not communicate this ahead of time but I am finally back. It has been a crazy past couple month with my balancing abilities put to the test. No one can truly prepare you for the final semester of the college experience, that’s for sure. I was a little over-ambitious with my four-day work week on top of two days of interning and all of my final papers and projects… No good, folks.
Even when you think you’ve got it all under control and you’re seeing the light at the end of that tunnel, you can’t quite decide if you want to walk into the light or not. Because beyond that light is the big, scary real-world where you don’t have your instructors holding your hand anymore. You begin to realize the attachments you’ve made with your classrooms, instructors, and classmates. So while you should be planning your celebrations, you’re too sad to even think about it. I never knew college attachment was a real thing and I only went to a commuter campus.
However, I have begun the transition into the real world. At first, I was extremely disappointed I had not been offered a job straight out of finals week… especially after a few interviews. Don’t get me wrong, I am extremely grateful for my job and it has given me the experience that I need. After four years of what seems to be endless education, you’re pretty doggone ready to be rewarded for it. I became frustrated and it took over my thoughts and attitude. I noticed my demeanor completely changing and I was much less unpleasant to be around.
My boyfriend began to notice how frustrated I was and reminded me that just because I didn’t get those jobs does not mean I am not worthy of it, it just means I am meant elsewhere. At first I was defensive and irritated; however, after putting things back into perspective, I began to see clearer. I reminded myself that God is much bigger than any job or challenge I may face. Now, this doesn’t mean I stopped trying and expect the job to fall into my lap. I have been diligently job searching. However, my perspective has completely changed. I am no longer moping around in my sorrows and let-downs. Now I am legitimately excited for where I will end up because I know it will be a better fit than I could plan for myself.
One of my favorite passages is Matthew 6:30-34 (MSG): “If God gives such attention to the appearance of wildflowers- most of which are never even seen- don’t you think he’ll attend to you, take pride in you, do his best for you? What I am trying to do here is to get you to relax, to not be so preoccupied with getting, so you can respond to God’s giving. People who don’t know God and the way he works fuss over these things, but you know both God and how he works. Steep your life in God-reality, God-initiative, God-provisions. Don’t worry about missing out. You’ll find all your every human concerns will be met. Give your entire attention to what God is doing right now, and don’t get worked up about what may or may not happen tomorrow. God will help you deal with whatever hard things come up when the time comes.”
What a perfect way to describe my attitude now. I am so thankful for a God who supplies all of my needs. Here’s to a new season, with new adventures and opportunities! Thank you all who have supported me, old and new friends. I am truly thankful for each and every one of you. Go Cougs!!
JessicaRayDaily 